It's freaky when you read a novel at this precise moment,
only to see it reflect upon your EXACT thoughts.It almost seems too real.
And i can only silently wish that i could take back everything i said.I'm sorry if i scared you.
Or if i hurt you with what i said.Nobody wants to hear those things.
And most definitely not you.All i know is that
I'm scared too."Dogs of Babel" is a really good read.
And the marvels of her words never fail to amaze me."Suicide is just a moment. For just a moment, it doesn't matter that you've got people who love youand the sun is shining and there's a movie coming out this weekend that you've been dying to see. It hits you all of a sudden that nothing is ever going to be okay, ever,and you kind of dare yourself: Is this it?You start thinking that you've known this was coming all along,but you don't know if today's going to be the day.And if you think about it too much, it's probably not. But you dare yourself.You pick up a knife and press it gently to your skin,you look out a nineteenth-story window and you think,i could just do it. I could just do it. And most of the time, you look at the height and you get scared,or you think about the other people at the sidewalk below - what if there are kids coming home from school and they have to spend the rest of their lives trying to forgetthis terrible thing you are going to make them see? And the moment is over. You think about how sad it would've been if you never got to see that movie, and you look at your dog and wonder who would've taken care of her if you had gone. And you go back to normal. But you keep it there in your mind. Even if you never take yourself up on it,it gives you a kind of comfort to know that the day is yours to choose. You tuck it away in your brain like sour candy tucked in your cheek,and the pukering memory it leaves behind,the rough pleasure of running your tongue over it's strange terrain,is exactly the same."Ok despite the subject matter,
which i assure you is not one of mine right this moment,although i am sure every single person reading this has gone through such,
this is what i call brilliant writing.Nothing complex.
Simple, succinct.Like what everything ought to be.
she spoke at
7:57 PM
(work aside...peaks ahead)
One book down, another to go.
Just a note, American Gods wasn't too shabby.
Old Gods vs New Gods? Interesting perspective.
Anyway, for my geeky friends out there,
Just started on a new book that has been said to be next "The Lovely Bones"
(yes Marc, i know you loved that book)
And if that's not good enough a reason to read it.
I honestly don't know what is.
Came across a review online:
Where The Lovely Bones used a sledgehammer to get its point across,
The Dogs of Babel is as precise as a razor blade.
While The Lovely Bones attempted to soothe mourners
with cheap, cloying sentimentality,
The Dogs of Babel gets to the real heart of grief.
There is no loved one looking down from heaven,
no reassurances that we will all meet again in the afterlife.
There is simply a man and the empty half of his bed.
That got you yet?
Anyway i will reserve final judgment till i finish the book.
(Mostest: i wanna read your so-called 'holding the man' book!)
Honestly, having come as far as half the book,
i can only admire the relationship between the 2 mains.
Makes you wonder if that is actually possible.
Just maybe.
Anyway something interesting from the book...
"It's true isn't it, that each of us has two hearts?
The secret heart, curled up behind a fist, living gnarled
and shrunken beneath the plain, open one we use every day...
It's not the content of our dreams
that gives our second heart its dark color;
it's the thoughts that go through our heads
in those wakeful moments when sleep won't come.
And those are the things we never tell anyone at all."
So far so good.
And it's been too long since i read a really awesome book.
(and you learn that waking up early for a heartwarming breakfast is a good thing)
Thanks for always being a mountain.
I honestly don't know what i'd do without you, my mostest.
(and you learn that it is exhausting to do things that are unneccessary)
And i'll stand my ground.
Just in case you ever run away.
(and you know that long walks at 11pm still works wonder)
Nothing but you & fabrication of thoughts.
Of possibilities & the comfort of silence.
(and you will be there someday)
Just not today.
(and you wonder about what is it you really want)
You've got to stop.
On days you want to pull your hair out.
F*** the contradictions.
(you, you read me like a book and i thank you for that)
I've come to realise that i really miss A.D.R.E.N.A.L.I.N.E.
That sudden rush.
The crazy feeling of losing control.
And in that very split second,your life hangs by but a mere thread.
The last form of mild adrenaline i got was from a short Go-Kart escapade.Yup! That's me right there. Speeding like nobody's business.
After which i got a "i am not going to let you drive my car."Oh come on...haha.
The Reckless Champ.I need a little more.
Spin me spin me spin me away.It's also funny how MSN emoticon shortcuts can translate into real life emotions.
Got a message from a friend saying milk>
LOL!
And in case you were wondering, it a rabbit hugging a bottle of milk,
which we use very affectionately.
In the meantime...the favourite song of the moment has moved,
from the likes "you don't wear my chainssss...."(yes. Boston. Bloody hell the lead singer is HOT!)
to a brilliant track (i say so!) by Josh Kelley."Almost Honest"Speaking of which, aren't we all? So in the meantimeYou'll be resting on my mindFor the last timeI will leave myself behindIn the eveningRaise a glass and tell some liesMake a pass, impress another girl,She was easy on the eyesShe was easy And so was IMy reflectionIn the window when I ride for ChicagoShe is on the other sideTake a pictureWrite a letter to my loveWell I was almost honestI was almost honestBeen a long timeSince I've laid with you in bedConversations, full of words you never saidI got your messageBut I didn't hear the ringing bellI gave into the lonelinessBut I didn't give them nothing elseWhich directionDown this highway that I ride to AtlantaShe is on the other side Take a pictureWrite a letter to my loveI was almost honestWell, I was almost honestYeah, Oh oh oh HmmmmmMy reflectionIn the window when I rideCould not save usBut I swear to God I triedTake a pictureWrite a letter to my loveI was almost honest But I was almost honestCause I was almost honestL WORD 4 TOMORROW!
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!And the silent afterthoughts.
she spoke at
5:17 PM
Friday, July 06, 2007
So i haven't been regularly updating my blog.
What's been up you ask?Nothing much really.
Just that i have newfound respect of all construction workers simply because it is so tough to build a house!
For those who were not in the loop,
I was at Batam for a short volunteer 'build-a-house' trip with Habitat.As pictures paint a thousand words, here goes...
TRANSFORMER IS AWESOME SHIT!
don't you just love that yellow chevy? 'Baby don't go...'
Thanks to an awesome colleague (who's also my self-proclaimed OGF)
i was at the WOMAD 2007 press conference yesterday.Fantastic food (thanks to
Timbre!), FREE BEER (wooooo hoooo!),
free wine, free coke light, free CD, promo discs, what more can you ask for!And a short shopping spree @ Bugis street lead to an impulsive purchase.
Yes. I got a DRESSSSSSSS. *winks*
Now i'd have something decent to wear to Dhoom's wedding.
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!Oh...and to my dear friend who's flying to Bali early tmr morning.
Have tons of fun! And take more pictures! (of the BOTH of you please!)Then there's hopes of planning a short getaway.
*crosses fingers & toes & all things crossable*To soak up the sun,
To swim with the fishes
To relax on the deck chairs,
To feel the gentle breeze To stroll by the beach,
To dine by the sea
And to fall into a soft bed,
with you by my side.
As i whisper tender words into your ears,
and watch you fall sweetly into slumber.I am such a lamer.
Hopeless one at that.
she spoke at
12:17 PM
